The Old Spartan Couch

Top Definition

Def. 01 of 7

When you and a group of mates go away on one of those weekends, be it stag or golf or just something. And you get shown your rooms, you're all shown rooms, you're going to be like four to a room and stuff. See, someone's going to get the double bed. Someone gets, like, the sofa bed, and you think it's tiny. There's no way two are going in that. So one of you is getting the Spartan couch. And it is one of those beds that's like a Z bed or something that they just sort of fold out. And there should be no sleeping on it. And the headboard is made out of some wood that you don't see post-1952. It's that sort of heavily varnished orange wood. And it's springy. The match is really... it's got... it says, no, it's sprung. It's rubberwood.

Submitted by: Contributor Record Sealed · 17 May 2018

verified Mr. G. Coleridge · TML/F-217 · clerk C.P.

Public Endorsement

This definition: 1 · Entry total: 7

Endorsements logged to TML-0694/D01

filed in Vol. I, drawer 10, shelf 4

File index · TML-0694 · 7 records · select a ref to view

Ref	Contributor	Region	Filed	End.
D01	[redacted]	—	17 May 2018	1
D02	[redacted]	—	17 May 2018	1
D03	[redacted]	—	17 May 2018	1
D04	[redacted]	—	17 May 2018	1
D05	[redacted]	—	17 May 2018	1
D06	[redacted]	—	17 May 2018	1
D07	[redacted]	—	17 May 2018	1

Alternate Definitions

D02

Two milk crates with a scaffold plank between them.

Submitted by: · 17 May 2018

verified Mrs. E. Tindall · TML/F-204b · clerk G.L.S.

D03

The only space left on the sofa next to the father who hates you.

Submitted by: · 17 May 2018

verified Mrs. E. Tindall · TML/F-204b · clerk P.W.

D04

When moving house you don measure the door frames properly so the piece of furniture that wouldn't fit is now in the back garden two years later.

Submitted by: · 17 May 2018

verified Mr. G. Coleridge · TML/F-204 · clerk P.W.

D05

Your nan's old sofa that's been in existence since the dawn of time. Horrendously patterned with beige flowers that has the strange ability to relieve you of the contents of your pocket every time you sit on it. You then rummage down the back to find matchbox cars, old 5P pieces and Everton mints, but never what you've actually lost.

Submitted by: · 17 May 2018

verified Mr. H. Okafor · TML/F-204b · clerk G.L.S.

D06

When your flight is delayed and there is nowhere to sit, so you turn your luggage items into a makeshift piece of furniture.

Submitted by: · 17 May 2018

verified Mrs. P. Akande · TML/F-204b · clerk N.R.

D07

A row of two or more bollards outside a kebab shop that make the perfect sit-down for you and your drunken mates.

Submitted by: · 17 May 2018

verified Mr. G. Coleridge · TML/F-217 · clerk G.L.S.